Each side of the lake
has a neighborhood.
One has
tall houses,
wraparound decks,
private sheds, docks.
The other has
ranchers, trailers,
kayak racks,
flagpoles.
A motorboat goes by,
with a child in an inflatable tube.
A small boat coasts along the edge.
Three men stand on different sides,
fishing rods in hand.
One waves across the lake
at another boat
with other men doing the same thing.
A child stands on a paddleboard
off the shore of a backyard.
An older woman watches her
from the porch.
Another motorboat zooms by—
faster, a larger wake.
Your kayak rocks.
A single man on board,
music blaring, hair flowing in the wind.
Tag: Outdoors
An Open Spot
A heatwave swallows the mountain.
Attempt to escape.
Turn off to Trillium Lake.
A line of brake lights greets you
half a mile from the lot.
The wait and the crowd seem
less worth the trouble every minute.
Try Clear Lake next,
find a full parking lot, cars
parked illegally along the highway.
Form a new plan, wait to slip in
as people leave in the afternoon.
Drive up to Timberline Lodge,
see Trillium below, its surface
as much boat as water.
It’s hard to care about the debates of the Entmoot
when the flames of Mordor surround you.
You drive back to Timothy Lake,
through three parking lots
to find an open spot.
On the water, you stop paddling, coast in the shade.
Cold water drifts through your fingertips.
Two Canada Geese
Two Canada geese
swim out from the shadow of the tree line
along the edge of the lake.
They turn at a right angle,
travel around the dock
along the boat ramp.
A motorboat
pulls in to moor
at the end of the dock.
The geese startle,
flap their wings, spin,
give a wide berth.
They continue
to the shore, turn to continue
along the edge of the lake.
People in paddle boards,
children and dogs
crowd the shallow water.
They slalom
around the obstacles,
reconnect beyond the beach’s reach.
Two Canada geese
swim into the distance
along the edge of the lake.
On the Surface of the Water
Soft ripples in reflections
of the shore and the ridge behind it
create a fluctuating barcode
on the surface of the water.
You row by a tree trunk doing a headstand
in the middle of the lake.
Its body leans at a 60-degree angle.
As you approach, you find
several large nails hammered into it,
abandoned.
You stop rowing,
watch drops of water fall from your paddle,
the growing ripples trail behind you.
A subtle breeze over still water,
which changes color
in the clear reflections of
the green ridge,
the blue mountain,
the brown shore.
You travel through
a village of stumps in the lakebed,
decapitated a century ago.
Their raised roots spread like spider legs.
Footholds are carved in their trunks.
On your way back,
you see two motorboats descend the ramp.
You hear them start,
see them speed to the opposite side of the lake—
still audible once out of view.
The reflection of the mountain
becomes a pale static.
One Day
One day, the life that flowed through you
will be gone,
leaving only
the husks of your bones
to dry in the sun.
One day, the sun, wind, and rain
will erode those bones,
leaving only
the impact you had
on the landscape.
I Just Want to Be a Good Dad
Each section is based on the Oxford English Dictionary’s word of the day from August, 2024.
I. mob-lolatry, n.
I just want to be
a good dad,
you know?
They’re always on about how
we never go anywhere.
And, it’s so damn hot,
I don’t mind the idea
of being in a car all day.
The 12 straight hours of Taylor Swift
doesn’t sound that bad either.
II. devil’s horse, n.
Logically, I know
bugs happen in campsites—
it’s their home.
I didn’t expect
them to overwhelm our tent
while I pumped up the mattresses.
I also didn’t think
Aria would give a name
to every grasshopper.
III. panchreston, n.
Aria’s attention span
is what you would expect
of a six year old.
Unlike her older sister,
she does not want to sit in the shade
rereading The Maze Runner.
So, instead, I send her on a quest
to find the perfect walking stick.
Works every time.
IV. nosebleeder, n.
The next day,
another long drive
down California.
Claire looks up from her book,
asks about the mountain
out her window in the east.
“I think that’s Lassen,” I say,
squinting toward the morning sun.
“That’s where we’re camping today.”
“ON the mountain?!” she asks.
After I say no, she focuses on it again.
“Can we try to climb it though?”
V. megstie, int.
“What?! You can’t be serious!”
I gasp. “It’s a volcano!”
Aria looks up from her iPad.
“I want to climb a volcano!”
“You too? There’s no way
we could do it.”
“It has to be possible,” Claire responds.
“I’m googling it.”
VI. kass-kass, n.
Claire says
the hike to Lassen Peak is
“only five miles long.”
I say
we don’t have hiking essentials and
would need to go to a store first.
Aria says
she wants to plant a flag on the top
“like Neil Armstrong.”
I say
she can barely focus
through an episode of Bluey.
They say
I’m “a force of inertia”
and “a big meanie.”
I tell
Claire to find
the closest Big 5.
VII. hdb, n.
We have to stop in Redding
to get ourselves
actual hiking shoes and packs.
Claire’s directions from Apple Maps
sends us meandering through
three neighborhoods on the way.
VIII. bellywash, n.
They do a lap around the store
to break in their new shoes and packs
while I find some for myself.
They return with
three tall glass bottles of lemonade
while I stand on the balls of my feet.
They tell me how hot it’s been and
we’re buying expensive shoes anyway
while I check my card balance on my phone.
Aria hugs the bottles and
Claire balances the shoe boxes
while I lead them to the checkout.
IX. biblioklept, n.
During the drive to Lassen,
Claire finishes the Maze Runner,
infodumps about new details she noticed.
Don’t worry, she packed a backpack
specifically for backup books
just for this situation.
She takes out a brick of a book
from her mobile library,
starts reading.
X. onion, n.
I successfully get them both
up and in the car before dawn—
a literal miracle.
The drive is winding switchbacks.
Aria complains about her ears popping.
Claire eyes the wildfire remnants we pass.
The sun rises as we pull into the parking lot.
Another family starts their hike
as we get ourselves ready.
XI. dumb phone, n.
Don’t know why, but when
I put my phone in my pocket,
I feel her phone in my hand
from the last hike we went on
before she passed.
She loved hiking, looked forward
to taking our daughters
on her favorites when
they were old enough.
She never got to do that.
Her equipment is still
in the back of our closet—
I can never bring myself
to look at it.
XII. tragedietta, n.
Aria is ready to run up the mountain,
Claire right behind her.
I stop by the trailhead to look at the map,
check for safety notices.
The hike description says,
“Strenuous.”
XIII. southpaw, n.
“Come on, Dad!” Aria yells,
drawing zigzags in the dirt
with the walking stick she found
the first night of our trip.
XIV. oysterling, n.
For the first 500 feet,
Claire keeps a constant pace.
Aria, on the other hand, runs
straight to the first switchback,
leans around the interpretive sign,
stares at the fading social trail
that goes straight up the ridge,
taps the wall with her foot.
“Don’t even think about it,”
I warn, stopping to stretch my legs.
XV. blackberry, v.
Aria sighs. Her walking stick
leaves a snake in the dirt.
Claire picks pines off
branches as she passes,
twirls them between her fingertips
as she hums “Cruel Summer” to herself.
XVI. sprig, v.
Loose dirt and gravel
shift underfoot on the
next stretch of trail.
Almost wish my shoes
were spiked like cleats
to stop from slipping.
XVII. hap-harlot, n.
The last time I looked over
a talus on the side of a mountain,
she was still alive and smiling.
We laid a blanket on the shore of a lake.
She told me about an article she read
as a pika ran around the rocks behind her
with a mouthful of wildflowers.
XVIII. peepling, n.
We rest at the next switchback
in the shade of a clump of trees.
Aria hands me her walking stick,
jumps onto a log along the side of the trail,
announces, “Now on beam: Simone Biles,”
cautiously walks across the log and back,
jumps, lands with her arms above her head.
Claire and I, and some passersby, applaud.
XIX. milder, v.
Little shade
covers the next section of trail.
Relentless sun
bakes the rock underfoot.
Sweat pours down my face
like rain on a windshield.
Whimsy becomes determination;
irritation grows on their faces.
XX. ramgunshoch, adj.
The morning sun warms up
quicker than anticipated.
Aria’s shoulders are slumped;
her walking stick drags behind her.
She asks Claire why the trees
get shorter the higher we go up.
Claire gives a short, uncertain answer
and a short, sudden insult.
Her walking stick hits the ground
as she runs further up the trail.
XXI. hyphy, adj.
When I try to talk to Claire about
how what she said was wrong,
she erupts into a loud tirade
like a pan of forgotten pasta on the stove.
Listen, nod, watch her eyes.
She needs to sit down and drink water.
I pick up Aria’s walking stick,
lead Claire to the nearest shade.
XXII. oxford comma, n.
A tree, a stone, and shade.
Sweat, dust, and sunscreen.
Sit, drink, and breathe.
Me, Claire, and—
oh shit.
Where is Aria?
XXIII. chicken dance, n.
No sign of her.
No sign of her.
No sign of her.
I drop everything,
run up the trail.
How far could she have gotten?
Never felt such speed before.
Never played such a frantic game of I Spy before.
Never investigated footprints like a crime scene before.
Her name comes out
of my arid throat
like a squawk.
XXIV. gabster, n.
Magnolia would never
lose control like this.
She was an attentive mother.
I did my best,
but I couldn’t compare.
She had a way of talking,
connecting with people
that I can’t replicate.
XXV. pepper-water, n.
Tears sting my cheeks.
My thighs full of magma.
Rocks fly under my dashing feet
like arrows in a boobytrapped tomb.
At the top of a man-made staircase,
behind a boulder, by a squat pine tree,
Aria hugs her knees to her chest,
crying, crying.
Approach slowly. Say her name gently.
Wrap her in my arms. Never let go.
Her tears, sweat soak my shirt.
My tears, sweat soak her sunhat.
XXVI. bada, adj.
I tell her I’m glad she’s safe,
that what her sister said
was inappropriate.
Her face is pink, but
I can’t tell if its the heat,
the hike, or her feelings.
I get her water bottle
out of his backpack,
tell her to drink some.
XXVII. pussivant, v.
Big feelings come out
like shaken up soda.
She’s speaking a language
I can’t understand.
I listen to her timbre,
read her face.
XXVIII. anthomania, n.
Air enters her lungs
sounding like worn-out brakes.
Rhythm becomes steadier,
the sound less harsh.
Her eyes on the wildflowers
in the valley below us.
XXIX. chao tom, n.
I help get Aria back to her feet,
get her things back in order,
say we need to find her sister.
Claire comes around the bend,
carrying Aria's walking stick,
which I realize I dropped in my panic.
She offers it to her along with an apology,
says the heat and lack of water got to her,
but it's no excuse for hurting her.
XXX. taffety tart, n.
She digs a Kind bar out of her backpack,
tosses it to Aria and says,
"We've almost conquered the volcano."
Within seconds, chocolate is smeared
on her face. She holds her stick aloft,
screams like a soldier running into battle.
XXXI. upful, adj.
Finally, the trail flattens.
Four interpretive signs greet us,
a large rock in their center.
Haze on the horizon,
a cloudless sky above.
Claire drops her pack
by a sign about butterflies,
pulls out her phone to take pictures.
Rocks cast short shadows
under the merciless sun.
Aria scurries around a sign
about the different types of volcanoes,
plants her stick between rocks above the forest.
The wind amplifies her cheer
as it echoes down the mountainside.
I think I did okay.